Difficult Things, On Purpose
Summiting St. Helens, and why networking should work the same way
This past week I summited Mt. St. Helens — the second of the six Pacific Northwest volcanoes I'm working through. The first was Rainier, years ago, and that climb is actually what the long-form essay linked below is about: the whole story of that first summit, what I learned doing it, and how it changed me.
I love doing difficult things. Not because I enjoy pain and discomfort — some people think there's a euphoric high waiting on the other side if you push hard enough. There isn't. You feel pain. You feel nausea. You feel discomfort. And it's not about reaching the top so you can signal to other people that you're strong and capable, either. For me, it's about pushing myself to a limit and coming out the other side changed — someone who knows they can make it through the hard thing, because in the moment, they found the will to push just one more step.
This coming week, I plan to bring that mentality to networking events — both our own Firefly Social in Cap Hill on Tuesday (linked below) and other people's events. I've been focused lately on building connection — not lead gen, not networking as a euphemism for hunting. Connection.
I talked to a guy at an event recently who left a little deflated — he didn't walk out with a new paying client. And look, I get it. But when did we get so caught up in instant gratification? Networking events have become like dating apps: everyone wants to walk away with something to show for it, a point on the scoreboard, proof that they moved the ball.
If you walk into a networking event expecting to leave with an offer or a buyer, take a breath. That's not how good business starts. It starts with real people having real conversations, no ask attached. You leave. You see them again somewhere else. Trust builds. And when they're ready to buy, they're already thinking of you.
Stop hacking the system. Build the relationship. Do the difficult thing. Focusing on one-off closes might get you individual sales, but building real lasting connections is how you build a recurring revenue stream.
Hope to see you at this week's event — and if you haven't already, check out the first episode of the podcast, where we dig into the impact of technology on human behavior.
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